Here’s the scene: I’m torn between playing a game with the family and taking the shower I so suddenly crave.
I just want to be cleansed by water in the way only water can cleanse.
Fire is too hot.
Air can be a bit cold.
Ether is spacey.
Earth, a little muddy.
Water is so clean and alive and full of promise and insight. We need all the elements, of course. Do I even need to say that?
It’s just that we also need water. In this moment, I need to feel her embrace.
When I choose & I’m in the shower, I realize: This is all that matters.
Just me and the water, the candlelight that peers at me like a pure loving owl, the incense wisp.
How the water rains on my shoulders and cleans everything.
How she showers me with universes of kisses, liquid light.
I almost say ‘millions of kisses.’ But that’s not right. You scientific left-brained types would visualize a mere million kisses and downplay the experience.
I told the fam I’d take a short shower, but we all know better. I don’t take short showers.
Once I’m in, I’m in.
I asked to be cleansed and nourished by my element.
To have that happen, it’s important that I’m present.
I could be in the shower all the while thinking about how I need to rush out of the shower, all the things that are waiting for me to do when I’m done. But who wants to make love with that kind of partner?
Wherever I am, there I am. When I look at my life, this is very much the case.
(Not always. But I’m really way harder on myself than is necessary or true. I bet sometimes you are too.
Take a moment to see and even write down all the ways you’ve been there for yourself, all the ways you’ve followed your heart.)
My showers are like my coffee. Maybe I drink a little too much and too hot.
I like the idea of a cold shower. But I like the heat. I’ve done the cold things, glacial lake & alpine dips, waterfalls, ice field expeditions.
In this moment, I’m letting go of shoulds and luxuriating in the steamy warmth.
I need this time, just as much as the kids need the time I give them. We strike a balance.
So when I’m with them I’m showing them how they mean the world to me, how much they teach me, how proud I am of them for simply being them, how I adore them.
One of the ways I adore them is by adoring myself. They absorb the various ways to self-love by osmosis.
Instead, I could be showing (and most certainly on occasion have shown ) them how annoying and inconvenient they can be.
A shower cleanses away the debris. Sometimes, that’s called for more than family game time.
Let your next bathing be a sacred cleansing simply by staying present to the electric flow of water sparkling over your body & the concurrent lightning-like strikes of insight.
The little things matter.
Bless yourself & you bless those in your inner circle too. And beyond beyond it ripples out ))) ) )
In blessing,
Heather